Blackhawks say Bickell missed Sunday with … ‘lower-body wardrobe malfunction’

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The 2013-14 regular season is right around the corner, so the hockey world should ready itself for several months of comically vague injury reports. At least the Chicago Blackhawks had a sense of humor – maybe toilet humor – about why Bryan Bickell missed Sunday’s preseason game (a 4-3 win against the Detroit Red Wings), though.

Joel Quenneville explained to reporters that Michael Kostka played today because Bickell had a “lower-body wardrobe malfunction.”

While it’s anyone’s guess how many times this issue has squeezed out in NHL history, the injury report has to be a first.

CSNChicago.com’s Tracey Myers remarked that she doesn’t even want to know the details, but there are just so many¬†important questions. Was it the result of some locker room prank? Did Quenneville make this all up to entertain our inner children on a preseason Sunday? (Hockey has some serious competition in the Emmy’s and Breaking Bad, after all.)

Let’s just hope someone gets to the bottom of this.

(Sorry.)