Winnipeg’s male fans want to urinate faster, start petition

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The Canadian Press is reporting that male fans of the Winnipeg Jets have started an online petition to replace bathroom urinals at the MTS Center with old-fashioned troughs.

“Bring back the trough,” the petition states. “Have you notice [sic] the long line ups at the MTS Center mens washrooms. Back in the days of the Winnipeg Area [sic], the trough system made that wait short.”

More than 230 people have signed the hastily-spelled petition, which urges the MTS Centre to ditch single-serve urinals. There’s just a handful of porcelain wall potties in each of the arena’s eight concourse-level washrooms, often resulting in long wait times.

“Oh, it’s killer, it’s killer, especially when intermission comes. It’s very long waiting,” Jets fan Don Lavallee told CBC News.

The excessive wait times have resulted in male fans missing parts of games, something male fans find unacceptable. As such, they’re open to the idea of peeing together into a big metal receptacle, which I think is how the plague got started.

An MTS Centre official said they’ve heard the call for cattle-style relief, but insist the current bathroom system will remain in place. This is probably because society has made a lot of positive advancements in the urinal field, and the MTS Centre doesn’t want to be the one setting that back.