Blake Bortles

PHT’s six super awesome most favorite things about the NHL lockout

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Happy New Year!

Thanks for visiting PHT on a day normally reserved for finding your car keys and dignity. Because you’ve all been such good sports, we’re going to do you a solid and kick the year off right…by being positive.

Yes, positive.

Look, we know the NHL lockout’s been a drag. (Also acceptable: “sad” or “wholly unnecessary.”) But that doesn’t mean we can’t find the bright side — y’know, the parts of the work stoppage that make you realize hey, some good things have come out of the last 108 days.

Granted, not many good things. But some.

Okay, six. There have been exactly six good things.

And here they are.

Way more time to follow other sports

Like the NBA. We can’t remember the last time we got to watch professional hoops on a regular basis. Did you know the SuperSonics moved to Oklahoma City? Seattle basketball fans will really miss Tom Chambers.

We’ve also been enjoying college football’s many, many bowl games. Central Florida’s victory over Ball State in the Beef ‘O’ Brady’s Bowl was very impressive. We thought that game would be closer, but we guess Knights quarterback Blake Bortles had other plans!

Google Translate and its wacky Google translations

One trick to being really good hockey journalist guys: Go straight to the source (or so we’re told.)

So, rather than wait for a proper translation of a European team announcing its big NHL signing, the trick is to copy text off the team website and plug it into Google Translate.

After all, any old website can tell you Ales Hemsky signed in the Czech Extraliga. But only Google Translate will tell you in such an enjoyable way, like “Hemsky agree yes to Pardubice consummate upon contract. On Tuesday join. Successful much oil man has been, though often injury.”

That guy Guy Serota

When federal mediators entered labor negotiations, a crack staff was assigned to the case. That included one Guy Serota, who was quickly unassigned due to a rather sketchy personal Twitter account.

Featuring bad jokes, foul language, an infatuation with Sarah Silverman and links to videos of himself (essentially ruining his “I WAS HACKED!” defense), Serota’s account didn’t exactly undermine the mediation process — let’s face it, nobody figured it would work in the first place — but it did lead to a bunch of hockey writers writing about a man and his “Ass Mode” shirt.

“The Italian second division? That exists?”

How else besides the lockout would we have learned about all the wild and crazy places guys can play hockey professionally? For example, did you know Denmark’s top professional league, the AL-Bank Ligaen, is sponsored by Dong Energy? We do.

And did you know there’s a Finnish second division team called KooKoo, and San Jose forward Tommy Wingels signed there? We do, which is how we ended up with the “Wingels is KooKoo for Finland” post.

And did you know Dale Weise is an offensive machine in the Dutch league? That must not be a very good league.

#lockoutproblems

Despite being out of work, many NHLers are still living awesome lives that render them almost completely out of touch with the general public. And they took the time to show us!

Evander Kane couldn’t get his money phone to work.

Derek Roy’s Ferrari is super loud on start-up.

BizNasty can’t find a decent seamstress outside of Barney’s New York.

Scottie Upshall’s vacation was too sunny.

Brandon Prust’s too.

Kyle Turris didn’t like Finland, Joffrey Lupul didn’t like Russia and Jay Beagle regretted buying that second house.

Learning the difference between “decertification” and “disclaimer of interest”

It’s weird, we were always under the impression they were the same thing, but it turns out they aren’t. Yes, both are ways to dissolve a union; however, decertification takes longer and is a more formal process than a disclaimer of interest. Cool, right?

It’s also been interesting to read about antitrust law as it pertains to professional sports. We never thought we’d get that opportunity when we became sports writers. We thought we’d have to write about sports all the time.

So that’s our list of six good things about the lockout. (Full disclosure: we tried to think of 10 but fell four short.)

Many thanks to all our readers for continuing to visit PHT. Here’s to a fantastic 2013. Go Knights!

BREAKING: Carey Price’s composure

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Even the best goalie in the world – one who makes it look easy – can lose his cool sometimes.

(Heck, that used to be the domain of Patrick Roy, right?)

It was quite the sight on Thursday nonetheless: Carey Price absolutely lost his cool and went after Kyle Palmieri during the Montreal Canadiens’ game against the New Jersey Devils. You can watch that spectacle in the video above.

Palmieri received an interference penalty while Price received a roughing double-minor. Apparently fits of Price anger are rare:

By Hockey Reference’s numbers, Price has accrued 39 penalty minutes in 465 career regular season games and eight in 54 playoff contests before tonight’s outburst.

Here’s the moment in GIF form, too.

Video: John Tavares exhibits all-out-effort on this goal

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Sometimes it feels like John Tavares is alone on an island. Even during such grimmer times, there are moments where it seems like he can do it all by himself, anyway.

The New York Islanders have been quietly getting it back together lately (4-0-1 in their last five games), with Tavares averaging a point per contest during that span. Still, he’s obviously been getting some help lately.

If you want an “all by himself” moment, look no further than the goal above, where he just out-efforts everyone. It’s an unusual sight, although especially jaded people may just come to expect this type of thing from Tavares. He’s that great.

Niskanen will miss at least one game from that Bergeron hit

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However you feel about the hit Patrice Bergeron delivered on Matt Niskanen, the bottom line is that the Washington Capitals defenseman is hurt.

The Capitals consider the valuable blueliner day-to-day with an upper-body injury and noted that he won’t travel to Buffalo for Friday’s game against the Sabres.

That only tells us so much, as the Capitals will face the Vancouver Canucks at home in their next game after that on Sunday. If that’s all he ends up missing, that wouldn’t be too huge of an issue. CSN Mid-Atlantic notes that he’s played in every game (all 189) since joining the Capitals, so he’s been healthy so far in his stay with Washington.

Washington called up defenseman Aaron Ness to help give them some depth.

As you may recall, Bergeron received a two-minute boarding minor for the check in question.

Bruised Blackhawks will be without Seabrook, Toews vs. Rangers

CHICAGO, IL - FEBRUARY 13: Brent Seabrook #7 and Jonathan Toews #19 of the Chicago Blackhawks
celebrate a second period goal by Seabrook against the Anaheim Ducks at the United Center on February 13, 2016 in Chicago, Illinois. (Photo by Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images)
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Scott Darling isn’t the only member of the Chicago Blackhawks who will be asked to step up with key players out of the lineup.

The Blackhawks have already ruled out Brent Seabrook and Jonathan Toews for Friday’s game against the New York Rangers, as CSN Chicago notes.

This will mark the eighth consecutive game Toews is missing, although the bright side is that Joel Quenneville didn’t dismiss the possibility of Chicago’s captain playing on Sunday.

Seabrook is considered day-to-day after being shaken up by this awkward spill from Wednesday:

A few days ago, Patrick Kane called upon others to step up with Toews out. That message can now apply to Chicago’s defensemen with Seabrook banged up.