The Los Angeles Kings aren’t satisfied with merely rampaging their way through the 2012 playoffs. They want to leave us guffawing all the way through it.
Their Twitter account is the thing of consistent snarky genius. They made a prank from “The Office” come true. Yet some fans might be a little lost in all the comic chaos, so the Kings’ Web site provides a rather hilarious (albeit maybe a bit “actually needed”), meta-tastic infographic that you can check out here.
It’s too large to post here, but let’s go over some of the bigger laughs.
- The Kings rattle off their long list of team logos, but they also remind people that they never employed the NBA Sacramento Kings’ image. Also: “Zero: Years Kings have either played in Sacramento, thought about playing in Sacramento or invested in a feasibility report on a potential move to Sacramento.” (Sounds like a solid quip toward both the Kings and the Golden State Warriors, really.)
- Drew Doughty’s career goals: 43; Brad Doty’s: 0. (Full discretion: I had to Google Brad Doty. I’m not a racing guru, but apparently a local anchor mixed the two up.)
- Question: “Do celebrities come to Kings games too?” Answer: “Only the Canadian ones” (with a photo of Justin Bieber).
The Kings aren’t required to have some much fun with their playoff run, yet in a bloated sports city with approximately five bajillion other entertainment options, it doesn’t hurt. Even if it gets them “in trouble” from time to time.
The NHL wants to take an educational approach — not a punitive one — to deter its players from using illicit drugs like cocaine.
“My interest is not to go around punishing people,” Bettman told Sportsnet today.
“My interest is getting players to understand the consequences of doing something that could jeopardize this great, once-in-a-lifetime opportunity that they’ve been given, to play in the NHL.”
While some players have expressed surprise at hearing that cocaine use is growing, the anecdotal evidence of substance abuse has been very much in the news, from Jarret Stoll‘s arrest to Mike Richards’ arrest to, more recently, Zack Kassian‘s placement in the NHL/NHLPA’s treatment program.
“We don’t have the unilateral right to do things here. We need the consent of the Players’ Association,” Bettman said. “It’s not about punishment. It’s about making sure we get it to stop.”
Related: Cocaine in the NHL: A concern, but not a crisis?
News and notes from around the crease…
Jones goes for San Jose
Martin Jones, acquired by the Sharks this summer, will make his first regular-season start for the club tonight against his old team — the Los Angeles Kings.
Jones, 25, spent the last two years in L.A. as Jonathan Quick‘s understudy. He was flipped to Boston at the NHL Entry Draft, then shipped to San Jose. Sharks GM Doug Wilson wasted little time locking Jones in — signing him to a three-year, $9 million extension — and Jones wasted little time locking up the No. 1 gig, putting together a stellar preseason.
For the Kings, Quick will get the start in goal.
Markstrom out for Vancouver
Jacob Markstrom wasn’t scheduled to start for the Canucks tonight — No. 1 Ryan Miller is getting the call — but the Swedish ‘tender won’t even dress when his club takes on the Flames in Calgary.
Markstrom suffered a lower-body injury at practice this week and is being held out of tonight’s action. In his place, the Canucks called up AHL netminder Richard Bachman, who’ll serve as Miller’s backup.
For the Flames, Karri Ramo is the opening-night starter.
Habs at Leafs: Carey Price vs. Jonathan Bernier
Rangers at ‘Hawks: Henrik Lundqvist vs. Corey Crawford